I'm finally understanding those 30 year old guys. They've got a steady girlfriend, they love her, enjoy being with her, are working hard at their job and are happy to keep it all just that way. They are not that interested in getting married, hey, why upset the apple cart? The future exists in, well in the future. Today they are just happy with the way it is today. They've got a lot on their plate, and I get it!
I've got work, kids, a house, two dogs and a steady boyfriend. It is all I can handle, just for today, and I handle it best today, just the way it is. Hey, why upset the apple cart?
January 14, 2009
January 12, 2009
A warning system
My youngest child benefits from my 'boy friend' as he does not have any girls and hence finds her immensely amusing. If you don't live with this child, she is immensely amusing.
This girl's birthday is just around the corner and she wants to include him, with some 'boundaries'. She wants him to come, but doesn't want to see us kiss. She makes it sound like we're two teens attached at the lips. NOT! A simple kiss, does sometimes happen, which is of course quite lovely for me.
Her solution is to have a warning system. She plans to make an alarm sound prior to entering a room where we might be.
This girl's birthday is just around the corner and she wants to include him, with some 'boundaries'. She wants him to come, but doesn't want to see us kiss. She makes it sound like we're two teens attached at the lips. NOT! A simple kiss, does sometimes happen, which is of course quite lovely for me.
Her solution is to have a warning system. She plans to make an alarm sound prior to entering a room where we might be.
January 11, 2009
Exposing oneself
In the past, I believed that I was a 'normal' person... ha, ha, ha. Today I've learned that perhaps I am a normal, yet 'private' person. Oh, right, that said from someone who has a blog on their mid-life dating. Hmmmm.... Okay, I guess that means I am a private person sometimes. There! That is sufficiently vague.
Steadily dating Josiah for the last 4 months. We've spoken or emailed each other everyday during that time. There are mentions of the other to our kids, but except for a few handful of times our time together has been solitary. We are both still entrenched in raising teens, so our opportunities to be together are infrequent and it is natural to chose to be alone when our schedules align.
Today he was at church with me. No big deal right? Well not exactly. I've been a member there for 25 years, was married there, sat on committees, baptized my children, cried, sang and am raising my children there. The majority of my friends belong there and it is there that I am known, it is my home, my extended family.
I did nothing out of the ordinary today, sang in the choir, greeted my friends, drank some horrible Presbyterian coffee, there with him.... and it felt like I was running up and down the pews naked! Well, maybe not naked, just in mismatched underwear with everyone to see, that I was there at church with a.... with a.. man.
Yes, I survived and all I can say is that if you weren't there, you might have missed it.
Steadily dating Josiah for the last 4 months. We've spoken or emailed each other everyday during that time. There are mentions of the other to our kids, but except for a few handful of times our time together has been solitary. We are both still entrenched in raising teens, so our opportunities to be together are infrequent and it is natural to chose to be alone when our schedules align.
Today he was at church with me. No big deal right? Well not exactly. I've been a member there for 25 years, was married there, sat on committees, baptized my children, cried, sang and am raising my children there. The majority of my friends belong there and it is there that I am known, it is my home, my extended family.
I did nothing out of the ordinary today, sang in the choir, greeted my friends, drank some horrible Presbyterian coffee, there with him.... and it felt like I was running up and down the pews naked! Well, maybe not naked, just in mismatched underwear with everyone to see, that I was there at church with a.... with a.. man.
Yes, I survived and all I can say is that if you weren't there, you might have missed it.
January 9, 2009
You might be a bad date if...
Your boobs are bigger than mine
You stand on your tip toes to try to kiss me
You steal the salt shaker on the way out of a restaurant
You are missing teeth and you're okay with it
You don't offer to buy my latte
You spend most of the date talking about your ex-wife
You tell me how you prefer a Brazilian, on the first date!
You stand on your tip toes to try to kiss me
You steal the salt shaker on the way out of a restaurant
You are missing teeth and you're okay with it
You don't offer to buy my latte
You spend most of the date talking about your ex-wife
You tell me how you prefer a Brazilian, on the first date!
January 8, 2009
Setting good examples
It would seem that there might just be two kinds of parents out there. Those that are concerned about setting a good example, and well those other ones.
For the most part, I've tried pretty hard to set a good example for my kids. Sheesh, I even gave up eating cookies for breakfast because of them.
Being an adult and having them watch you date opens a whole new Grand Canyon vista of opportunities for them to examine your behavior. Good or bad? Who knows! My own parents were married for 53 years, when Dad passed away.
I guess there is nothing in my dating at 49, that is a bad example for a 49 year old, however there in lies my concern, they are not 49.
So far they (those kids) seem to be launching into adulthood with pretty good heads on their shoulders. In fact they get to give me back all kinds of advice I might once have given them.
When pulling away for our Thanksgiving trip, my eldest said, "Okay, have fun and make good choices".
For the most part, I've tried pretty hard to set a good example for my kids. Sheesh, I even gave up eating cookies for breakfast because of them.
Being an adult and having them watch you date opens a whole new Grand Canyon vista of opportunities for them to examine your behavior. Good or bad? Who knows! My own parents were married for 53 years, when Dad passed away.
I guess there is nothing in my dating at 49, that is a bad example for a 49 year old, however there in lies my concern, they are not 49.
So far they (those kids) seem to be launching into adulthood with pretty good heads on their shoulders. In fact they get to give me back all kinds of advice I might once have given them.
When pulling away for our Thanksgiving trip, my eldest said, "Okay, have fun and make good choices".
January 7, 2009
Opportunity
Depending on my mood this word, opportunity is a gift or a curse.
Dating is just like life. Wow, how profound. We want our 'opportunities' to be exciting, open new horizons, be the grass we think is greener.
Yet, unless one is dating an alien life force, men are still men. They're fathers, workers, sons, they were often husbands and now they are dates, boyfriends and this is a whole new world.
There are days I am delighted by the new opportunity. To find out that my sweetheart thinks I'm worth the moon and the sky. Then there are days that the opportunity are too much, as I see this same man puts peas in the macaroni and cheese (yuck).
One of the few things I've learned in life is to never pray for patience. You never get patience delivered nicely on your doorstep, you get the 'opportunity' to practice patience. I for one have enough opportunities just for today.
Dating is just like life. Wow, how profound. We want our 'opportunities' to be exciting, open new horizons, be the grass we think is greener.
Yet, unless one is dating an alien life force, men are still men. They're fathers, workers, sons, they were often husbands and now they are dates, boyfriends and this is a whole new world.
There are days I am delighted by the new opportunity. To find out that my sweetheart thinks I'm worth the moon and the sky. Then there are days that the opportunity are too much, as I see this same man puts peas in the macaroni and cheese (yuck).
One of the few things I've learned in life is to never pray for patience. You never get patience delivered nicely on your doorstep, you get the 'opportunity' to practice patience. I for one have enough opportunities just for today.
January 3, 2009
yep, it is a whole new year
Wow, what a ride!!! This roller coaster of life has especially this last year given us thrills, chills and a few spills. No matter the ride, I find that I am a fairly balanced mix of introvert and extrovert. Enjoying my extroversion best with those I care about, making them laugh, enjoying time together and needing a bit of time alone from even them to regroup.
Just this time last year I was beginning the tiny steps toward dating again. Helped by the tool of the Internet, I forged ahead. Sat on my sister's bed with she and her partner, 'man sorting'. Looking at profiles and fine tuning my profile, ready to send it out there, into the dating void....
That was before I knew that there would be people trying to scam me, those guys who were 'in Africa building orphanages', sheesh, do I look that dumb or that rich???
I'm entering 2009 with a steady Sweetheart (sorry, he is 55 and 'boyfriend' just doesn't work) content with just dating for now. We're both still raising kids, trying to make a living and not tear our hair out, grateful for another adult who thinks we're special to spend time with.... beyond that...
well, today is enough for me to handle, I'll leave the rest up to my Lord. Thankfully he's in charge.
Just this time last year I was beginning the tiny steps toward dating again. Helped by the tool of the Internet, I forged ahead. Sat on my sister's bed with she and her partner, 'man sorting'. Looking at profiles and fine tuning my profile, ready to send it out there, into the dating void....
That was before I knew that there would be people trying to scam me, those guys who were 'in Africa building orphanages', sheesh, do I look that dumb or that rich???
I'm entering 2009 with a steady Sweetheart (sorry, he is 55 and 'boyfriend' just doesn't work) content with just dating for now. We're both still raising kids, trying to make a living and not tear our hair out, grateful for another adult who thinks we're special to spend time with.... beyond that...
well, today is enough for me to handle, I'll leave the rest up to my Lord. Thankfully he's in charge.
December 28, 2008
at this age...
One of the best things I've discovered about dating at this age, is that the men I'm dating are already old. Oh, okay... middle aged, that age group that gets bigger and bigger the older we get. Anyway, there are some little known benefits that come with dating 'middle aged' men. Well, like their eye sight for one thing. Hey, I'm not being mean here, it is just a fact, that they don't see as well as they once did. Really, 20-20 can be a bit over rated.
Just the other day, I was realizing I needed a pedicure. I had no time, then I realized, the toes weren't that bad and besides he doesn't see that well, I'd be just fine!
Just the other day, I was realizing I needed a pedicure. I had no time, then I realized, the toes weren't that bad and besides he doesn't see that well, I'd be just fine!
December 20, 2008
Just who am I dating?
Haven't you heard it said, that men marry their mothers. I don't know if it is true for women. I can tell you for sure, that the first time around, I did NOT marry my father. I may, however, now be dating him! It is just an odd feeling when he says or does something that is so reminisent of my dad. It is made weirder still by the fact that they have the same name. In times like this I call them Joe 1 and Joe 2.
December 1, 2008
I've heard it said...
I've heard it said, that the best thing about grandchildren is that you get to enjoy them, spoil and then.... send them home.
There are times, that dating in mid-life is a bit like that, enjoy him, spoil him or he spoils you and then.... send them home.
There are times, that dating in mid-life is a bit like that, enjoy him, spoil him or he spoils you and then.... send them home.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
